Nov. 20, 2013 Some argue that boys have become the ‘ new disadvantaged’ as the result of efforts to eradicate female disadvantage in a historically male biased education system. A widely accepted solution is more male teachers /role models in institutions for boys.
New research by Kevin McGrath and Mark Sinclair, published in Gender and Training , examines why it is that male teachers are the solution, exactly what benefits they bring to boys, and what benefits they bring to girls.
McGrath and Sinclair performed focus groups with 97 mothers and fathers and 184 students of varied social and ethnic backgrounds nationwide. They found that male students expressed a preference for male teachers because of perceived shared encounters, interests and ways of thinking. Young boys felt that men have a better understanding of their play and were much better able to relate.
For the girls, a male teacher represented an important opportunity to interact with and create relationships with men outside the family. This increased understanding of men acts an important role in girls’ effective transition into the wider world of university, work and their personal lives.
McGrath plus Sinclair conclude that male educators, whilst not proven to affect academic accomplishments in the classroom, certainly have a pertinent part to play in the social progress girls and boys.
Journal Reference :
- Kevin McGrath, Mark Sinclair. More male primary-school teachers? Social benefits for boysand girls . Sex and Education , 2013; 25 (5): 531 DOI: 10. 1080/09540253. 2013. 796342
April. 10, 2013 What’ s in a kiss? Research by Oxford University researchers indicates kissing helps us size up potential partners and, once inside a relationship, may be a way of getting a companion to stick around.
“ Kissing in human sex relationships is incredibly prevalent in various forms across just about every society and culture, ” says Rafael Wlodarski, the DPhil student who carried out the research in the Department of Experimental Psychology at Oxford University. “ Kissing is seen in our closest primate relatives, chimps and bonobos, however it is much less intense and less commonly used.
“ Therefore here’ s a human courtship behavior which is incredibly widespread and common and, in extent, is very unique. And we are still not specifically sure why it is so widespread or what purpose it acts. ”
To understand a lot more, Rafael Wlodarski and Professor Robin the boy wonder Dunbar set up an online questionnaire in which over 900 adults answered questions about the importance of kissing in both short-term and long-term relationships.
Rafael Wlodarski explains: “ There are three main theories about the role that kissing plays in sex relationships: that it somehow helps assess the genetic quality of potential buddies; that it is used to increase arousal (to initiate sex for example); and that it is useful in keeping relationships together. We wanted to see which of these theories held up under closer scrutiny. ”
The scientists report their findings in two papers, one in the journal Archives of Sexual Actions and the second within the journal Human Character , both published by Springer. They were funded by the European Research Council.
The survey responses showed that women rated the kiss as generally more important in human relationships than men. Furthermore, men and women who have rated themselves as being attractive, or who tended to have more short-term relationships and casual encounters, furthermore rated kissing as being more important.
In humans, as in most of mammals, females must invest additional time than men in having children — pregnancy takes nine weeks and breast-feeding may take up to several years. Previous studies have shown women tend to be more selective when initially choosing a companion. Men and women who are more attractive, or have a lot more casual sex partners, have also been found to be more selective in choosing potential mates. As it is these organizations which tended to value the kiss more in their survey responses, it suggests that kissing helps in assessing potential mates.
It has been recommended previously that kissing may allow people to subconsciously assess a potential companion through taste or smell, collecting on biological cues for compatibility, genetic fitness or general health.
“ Mate choice and courtship in humans is complicated, ” says Professor Robin Dunbar. “ It involves a series of periods of assessments where people ask them selves ‘ shall I carry on deeper into this relationship? ’ Initial attraction may include facial, body and social cues. Then assessments become more and more intimate as we go deeper into the courtship stages, and this is where kissing comes in. ”
He adds: “ In choosing partners, we have to deal with the ‘ Jane Austen problem’: How long do you wait for Mr Darcy to come together when you can’ t wait forever and there may be lots of women waiting around just for him? At what point do you have to compromise for the curate?
“ What Jane Austen realised is that people are extremely good with assessing where they are in the ‘ mating market’ and pitch their particular demands accordingly. It depends what kind of online poker hand you’ ve been dealt. If you have a strong bidding hand, you can afford to be much more demanding and choosy when it comes to prospective mates.
“ We see some of that coming out in the results of our survey, suggesting that kissing is important in assessing a potential partner, ” Teacher Dunbar explains.
Past research has also found that women place better value on activities that improve long-term relationships (since raising children is made easier with two parents present). In the current study, the group found that kissing’ s importance changed for people according to whether it had been being done in long-term or short-term relationships. Particularly, it was rated simply by women as more important in long-term relationships, suggesting that kissing furthermore plays an important role in mediating affection and attachment among established couples.
While high levels of arousal might be a consequence of the kiss (particularly as a prelude to sex), the researchers say it does not seem to be a driving factor that clarifies why we kiss in passionate relationships.
Other results included:
* In other words relationships, survey participants said the kiss was most important before sex, less so during sex, was less essential again after sex and had been least important at other times. In dedicated relationships, where forming and maintain a lasting bond is an important goal, the kiss was equally important before sexual intercourse and at times not-related to sexual intercourse.
* More frequent kissing in a relationship was linked to the quality of a relationship, while this wasn’ t the case for having more sexual intercourse. However , people’ s satisfaction with the amount of both kissing and sexual intercourse did tally with the quality of the relationship.
* In the companion paper in the journal Human Nature , the researchers report that women’ t attitudes to romantic kissing furthermore depend on where in their menstrual cycle and their relationship they are. Women appreciated kissing most at initial levels of a relationship when they were within the part of their cycle when they are likely to conceive. Previous studies have proven that hormonal changes associated with the period can change a woman’ s choices for a potential mate. When likelihood of conceiving are highest, women seem to prefer men who display intended signals of underlying genetic physical fitness, such as masculinized faces, facial proportion, social dominance, and genetic compatibility. It appears that kissing a romantic potential companion at this time helps women assess the genetic quality of a potential mate, the researchers say.
Since we’ ve all just recently celebrated Valentine’ ersus Day in our own special method, I thought I’ d share how much this time of year means to me.
4 years ago this very 30 days my life was full of uncertainty… but also, 4 years ago I finally produced a conscious decision to give up about how I thought society wanted me to reside. I had the slightest glimmer of hope things could be different. I was hoping things would get better and am was hoping God had a bigger plan for me than the one I was living at that time.
I decided to let go of my ‘ plan’ – the plan that everything needed to be a certain way and had to be simply perfect and I took a chance. Component of letting go and taking a chance was also saying yes when a special someone asked me to be his Valentines. Giving you a little back story, simply 2 weeks before he asked me personally to be his Valentine I had loaded up and left my outdated life and old relationship that will went completely against my values for years. I was finally able to awaken and realize I had to do something different. The LAST thing I wanted was to leap into another relationship… but every thing in my life seemed to be happening with out force or trying, so with the smallest glimmer of hope I responded with “ Sure, I’ ll be your Valentine. ”
Kevin (my now spouse & forever Valentine) was only the stepping stone for me changing the way I was living my life. Everyone thought we were crazy for jumping into our relationship (especially after knowing how our last one ended) – but I kept my promise in order to myself to quiet the voices of those around me and those within ‘ society’ and lead along with my heart. I removed the particular judgement from others stating the way we were doing it all ‘ wrong’ and replaced it with wish that there was a bigger, better arrange for me (and us) and all I needed to do was be faithful to myself.
Little do I know this was the beginning of a HUGE motion in my life. Looking at my life today I can’ t believe how much change can occur and how many blessings can come to surface in just four years when you’ re in a position to hold on to even the smallest bit of wish. The external blessings are obviously my loving husband, my on-the-way beautiful baby girl, my supportive network of like-minded women, the particular close-knit relationships with my family, the particular abundant success in my business… but above all else the biggest blessing in my lifetime now is how much love I keep for myself.
In the last four years I’ ve learned how to love myself on a daily basis System.Drawing.Bitmap choices that are only in my best interest. I’ m still learning daily and still work at quieting the particular voices of society telling me personally I’ m ‘ not carrying it out right’ – but those voices have gotten much smaller and I’ m forever keeping that glimmer of hope alive which allows me personally the opportunity to grow each and every year.
Happy Valentine’ s Day, women ~ remember to love yourself most of all, remember there is a bigger plan out right now there for you and remember never to lose ” special ” glimmer of hope… no matter how little it may be at the moment.
When it comes to trusting someone with your romantic relationship (and its future) individuals aiming to hire a private investigator and their particular matrimonial surveillance services should workout caution. As in any industry, there are several professionals that claim they have the most effective services at the most competitive prices but what tips can be used to ensure you land a top investigations firm to delve into your private life?
Most individuals will look to the web when hiring a matrimonial surveillance expert but how do you separate the whole wheat from the chaff when scouting out there a legitimate service? The first and most essential tip is don’ t consider websites at face value, seek information before you get in touch with them directly to guide a consultation. Start by checking out their signed up company number, the number found on the internet site can be entered into the Companies House WebCheck search. You can then use these details in order to cross reference the registered business name, address and even the name of the company’ s owner.
Many individuals looking to find matrimonial investigations providers will want a personal approach when coping with their relationship worries, so we often recommend opting for a locally based company, rather than a national service.
Playing investigator doesn’ capital t just stop their either, when you have shortlisted a couple of companies you wish to get in touch with directly, you should always check out their credentials. Do they have the correct level of indemnity insurance coverage? Are they registered with the Organization of British Investigators (ABI)? Could they be really being forthcoming about their own criminal history and are willing to disclose an up-to-date record check? These checks are usually vital if you are looking for a service that will doesn’ t let you down.
Take a closer look into exactly what services they offer to find the perfect private agent for your mission to uncover a cheating spouse or delve deeper into someone’ s murky past. Numerous investigations companies offer specialist support so you can harness a tailor-made, professional and thorough service, whatever your requirements may be.
At ABi Security Options, our select group of professional Private detectives and Surveillance Operators are highly skilled and experienced, with proven monitor records stretching back many years.
In case you are being tormented by bullies at your school, at work, or online, rest assured you are not powerless to stop them. Most schools, employers, and online communities plus Internet service providers are keen on stopping bullying. You only need to speak upward and take action for the bullying to stop. Don’ t think for a minute that if you don’ t do something, the bullies will go away. No-it doesn’ t work that way. Since the old saying goes, ‘ the squeaky wheel gets the grease. ’ In other words, if you speak up plus take action, you can fix the problem. Stopping lovato depends on the setting for the bullying.
Bullies are usually motivated by the fact that the people they will victimize don’ t raise the stink. If you want your tormentors to stop, you need to stand up to them and look them in the eye. Communicate clearly you are not going to take their abuse and that you will report them to the right government bodies. Spell out the consequences they might face. Regular penalties for bullies include suspension system, counseling, or expulsion. Make it clear that you aren’ t threatening but transliteration out what you will do. If they continue to bully you, follow through. If you don’ t follow through on reporting them, they are going to get only bolder and your misery will just get worse.
If you are being harassed or hazed, give the bullies fair warning by clearly telling them that their behavior is not welcome. If it continues, send an email describing the bothering incident and CC: your immediate supervisor. Bring the cc: to the interest of human resources personnel. Most workplaces are quite scared of potential lawsuits and legal liabilities. By sending a cc: to the immediate supervisors of the bullies as well as letting your job’ s personnel/HR department understand, you have put them on legal notice. The ball is in their court to check into the incidents you spelled out inside your email and either counsel, reprimand, or terminate the troublemakers. The key to this whole process is clear communication. You have to spell out when the bullying habits happened. List as many dates as you can remember. Describe the bullying since clearly as possible. What did they say to you? What actions did they take? How did you feel? Where there any kind of witnesses? As much as possible, quote the Human Resources/Personnel manual provisions that cover the bullying behavior. You need to call away HR/Personnel on the matter and follow up.
If you are the target associated with online bullying or cyberbullying, you should be aware of the fact that many online discussion boards, social networks, free blogging tools, as well as web hosts have policies concerning abusive behavior. The first time you get bullied, don’ t jump the gun. Keep calm and take screenshots of the harassing messages. Gather information about the bully or bullies giving you a hard time. Once you have gathered enough information, contact the city support department of the free on-line resource you are using. This applies to message boards, blogs, forums, and other free places online where people congregate. Just like in the workplace bullying situation, associated with details clear and provide screenshots. Usually, free resource sites and providers would help you block out the bullies and possibly erase abusive messages. If the bullies are using private hosted blogs to write abusive text about you, you can contact their web hosts about the matter. Many hosts have got anti-abuse policies and this might lead to your tormentors losing their hosting program.
Make no error about it, you don’ t use bullying lying down. Take the proactive actions above to ensure that bullies that try to mess with you quickly learn the errors of their ways.
This is article two of three. To distinguish key decisions in your life, first, look at your current circumstances because they are a representation of your beliefs and assumptions. If you find there is a pattern to your circumstances as well as your behavior then you know you produced a key decision that is being performed and re-played out in your life. For example , if you go from one bad romantic relationship to another, you likely made a vital decision about yourself and relationships that keeps you from suffering from loving, intimate connections. Or should you have chronic problems with money, again there is a key decision about what money indicates or what you deserve. Maybe you end up exhausted because you are always working and never give yourself a break. Did you make a decision at some point that you must constantly make an effort to do more, have more, be more?
One very useful exercise is to create your autobiography in order to review your existence story. Think back over your life and write down your memories about what you experienced, what life was just like, what you felt. Start as far back as you can. What do you remember between the age groups of 0-5, 5-10, 10-15, and so on? It is best to hand write your story on paper because this will engage your right brain more and stimulate your overlooked memories.
After you have an excellent collection of memories written down, take time to look for significant events and for designs.
- What patterns can you see?
- How did you respond to difficult events or pattern of events?
- How did you try to make yourself feel better?
- What do you do to try to succeed, get interest, or feel significant?
- Can you notice ways you learned to protect your self?
By answering these questions plus reflecting on the themes in your life you should be able to see some key choices you made that have influenced the particular course of your life and how you have resided.
In the first post I told you about the husband of a couple I am working with. The spouse also has an interesting story to tell. The girl grew up with her mother plus an old sister. Mom had men in and out of her life and some of them were controlling and abusive. Mom worked hard and went out often so my client essentially had to cope with life on her own. She found refuge in her friends and their families and got some of her needs for interest met. She made some essential decisions to cope with life by endeavoring to be perfect and make people such as her. She also decided the girl wanted to have a large family and dedicate herself to being the best mom she could be.
The main element decisions this client made helped her get some of her requirements met as a child and to be successful like a wife and mother as an mature. However , she was also very delicate to any indication of not being loved and valued. In the previous post we learned that her husband was good at providing and working hard although not skilled in emotional connection. The girl responded in the only way the girl knew, which was to be even more ideal and work for his acceptance. Inevitably this pattern led to resentment pertaining to both of them as they were not really getting what they needed from one one more. Again the good news is they both produced a commitment to learn how to change the essential decision patterns and create a new high quality of connection. The next article will certainly focus on how to understand and change self-defeating key decisions.
About the Author
If you’ re going through a break up, it can feel like you’ lso are drowning, and you’ re getting for anything that will save you. Anything to ease the pain, a quick fix. Both the bad and the good news is, as you will see, that there is no quick fix.
As soon as a break up happens, which may be a devastating blow, a wound has been inficted. This is sometimes not fully felt, as the ‘ dumpee’ can be left feeling numb, reeling, and often in complete denial. Even so a wound is there, a gaping, human-sized void where your spouse once was.
So , how can you go about healing a wound? Period is a wonderful healer, which is comforting, nevertheless there are things you can actively do to ease the pain. Firstly no contact is key, as any contact is going to maintain that wound raw, inflamed and also infected. This might sound dramatic, but anyone going through a break up knows the tangible emotional pain that can be felt.
A complete plus thorough approach is necessary here, which means no physical, verbal or internet contact, as well as limitation of how usually you think about your ex, and talk about your pet. Initially during the ‘ ripping’ period, where you’ ve been dumped (an awful word but the fall from the feeling of being loved to abandonment is just this) you will need to talk about the experience. Even further down the line expressing the feelings is important to clear out your system, and your mind. However early in the break up, to actively mend your life you will have to put ‘ you’ back in, plus remove ‘ him’.
It does boil down to a choice between you and your ex: either you think about him, plus question what went wrong, taking away from mending your life, or you consider what you need. A break up can be a life-shattering experience, and needs to be taken seriously. Respect yourself enough to allow yourself correct healing and care.
The more the reality of what’ s i9000 happened sinks in you will be aware of the events, and the character of your ex lover, in an entirely different light. Keep this in mind in the initial levels, as in the long run you may not even wish this person back who has caused you such pain and heartbreak.
There is no way to turn back the particular clock, but you can focus on the here and now, and remember the power you do have which you may not realise. No one is ideal, not even your ex, and the demise of the relationship took two people. You will get used to living each day without your boyfriend or girlfriend in it, but it is like learning to ride the bike again, or physical rehab after an injury.
If you do wish contact with your ex, ask yourself why you would want to be in touch with the person who caused these injuries on you. Life is your’ s to be enjoyed, and you do not need individuals in your life who complicate or endanger to ruin your’ s. There are plenty of kind, attractive (more than your boyfriend or girlfriend! ), generous, loyal and functional men who would love the opportunity to end up being your partner, make a life with you, and become at your side no matter what – to invest in you.
You are the loveable, valuable human being and can have the very best in life if you hold out for this. Choose wisely when selecting a partner for life, as that is what you are doing. It might feel painful and lonely right now, but a divorce further down the line, with children involved would be even worse. Inhale a big sigh of relief, as well as rest in the knowledge that ‘ what is for you won’ t move you by’. If this relationship with the ex is meant to work out, it will do with no help from you. So obtain busy living!